07 Jul Are you right?
Do you remember the first time you realised that not everyone thinks like you do? All your life, up until that very moment, you were under the impression that everyone in the world had a similar point of view to yourself. Then WHHAAMMM!!!!!! The truth hits you and says: ‘WAKE UP – There is never 1 point of view, more like 1 million points of view’.
I was 18 when this truth dawned on me. I know what you are thinking…. a bit late, but up until that point, anyone who disagreed with me was simply put into the ‘idiot’ category where I just filed them under ‘wrong’ and moved on.
I was sharing a house in Banff (Canada) with several kids my ages. I was the first to arrive in the house and so obviously took the biggest room (wouldn’t you?). Once everyone else arrived and all rooms were claimed, it seemed that the others felt that I should pay more than the rest. WHAT? WHY? Someone had to take the room, it wasn’t my fault that the architects made the rooms different sizes. I really couldn’t understand how ALL these people saw the situation so differently to myself, when I was obviously right! The thing was that if I didn’t come around to their point of view soon, then the rent wouldn’t be paid, and we would all get kicked out!
So I soul searched. I went through a self-made process that I later learned was very similar to the way the Buddhists all the time to deal with anger. I put myself in their shoes (metaphorically – I didn’t want further shoe rental charges). I made myself go through their entire thought process, step by step, until I finally got it. There was indeed another way of seeing this situation. And more importantly, my view was not necessarily the correct perception. From this day forward, I have always managed to call upon this very useful ability – to see things from other people’s point of view.
The morale is this: You may be right, you may be wrong – but what really matters, what really can make you grow, is if realise that you can be both.
Speak soon,
JT
speakingrights.com